35 Comments
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Cuckfucius's avatar

I'm gonna be in Nepal in July, if anyone's there holla at me!

perennialsif's avatar

my bull friend, i agree with your overall message here. i’ve learned driving a stick, drifting a car, programming, competitive fps games, etc and def in everything that i did that looked “effortless” definitely had a shit ton of effort and pain and suffering needed to get to that point. I do not dispute that.

when I think of wu-wei, i think about it differently though . instead, my experience of actually dissolving my nicotine addiction seemed through wu-wei. when I tried to fight it using willpower and effort, i was never able to quit it. In fact, the harder I tried and the more effortful I put, the more it seemed to not work. I was just fighting myself. Perhaps it was still useful and valuable for me to try so hard until I would realize I can’t do it through effort alone.

At a certain point, I let myself smoke. and the dissatisfaction of it, the not really needing it, and the disgust of it started to creep in (as well as seeing through the root of my cravings and psychological needs was also necessary). what dissolved my addiction was not effort but giving up effort. it was the lack of effort so that awareness can cut through where otherwise the mind would get in the way of the seeing.

today I do not have any effort to not smoke. I am just as indifferent to it as watching a particular color of paint dry. Could be fun or not, but there is no need to do it or not do it - I just don’t care.

imo, anyone who dissolved their addiction without effort really gets wu wei experientially. Many many who did AA have done it too and they attribute it to god’s grace (that’s how it felt to me as well). Like swimming with the flow - of course it’s effortless.

Cuckfucius's avatar

beautifully put fam, I think perhaps a level up in abstraction the unifying principle is "feeling your feelings", I've felt that with addictive patterns also, finally letting in the disgust/dissatisfaction, I don't know if you had this but there was almost a grieving process as well, or this feeling of just lying down and taking an L whenever I'd want to indulge (the L being letting the desire to indulge play out and fall away).

But yeah great comment and a perfect complement to the essay!

perennialsif's avatar

Yes! “feeling your feelings” is probably one of the most expressive and important advice. So much is trying to avoid feeling this or that. Haha yes I’ve had the grieving process too. And yep, had to take the L too loll. Thank you fam.

Eli Halpern's avatar

Thanks for this very stirring and funny post.

I think effort as you're using it implies a kind of internal resistance. Ballet training (I am a dancer) certainly requires work and full-body-aliveness, but those are crucially different from effort. Yeah, internal resistance comes up, but it's not the mechanism. To say that we must feel the frustration, or to say that we must sacrifice before we gain, is an assumption of the Western/Christian View.

We are conditioned to believe that feeling requires effort. But in my experience, when I actually feel something, it's like a fart passing through the body. Even the strongest paroxysms: effortless. The obstacle is more like overcoming the conditioned belief that life requires strain, frustration, the demonstration of effort. Wu-wei is merely a View of life, not a state of being. To untie these knots, we have to question our stories (really know ourselves, as you say).

Ok, but here we are anyway, coming from this angsty Western worldview. It's possible that running towards the frustration, effort, and pain is a good experiment. I think you are dead on that we should always be seeking the limits of our capacity. I was really inspired by the way you talked about it! Perhaps some people need to encounter frustration over and over until they don't View it as conflictual or existential anymore. Perhaps other people just need to follow the stream while staying alive in their bodies. Perhaps it's a case by case thang.

Cuckfucius's avatar

damn, this is a great comment, thank you for sharing your perspective and nuance. Agreed with the fart passing through the body metaphor, and the note on wuwei being a View of life rather than a state of being is refreshingly precise. I was definitely in the former camp of needing exposure to frustration to cultivate right relationship with it (and still am to a degree ofc), and definitely a case by case thang imo. Blessings!

Eli Halpern's avatar

Honestly, I probably am, too. I think I've just had to change tracks for a while because fear became a barrier to even putting myself in those frustrating positions.

Octopusyarn's avatar

Great piece! Keep bumping into this pattern where some concepts are maps and others are a compass (and confusing them is a common trap).

Frustration is the compass for achieving effortlessness (map)

Cuckfucius's avatar

this hit me like a ton of bricks, compass vs map, so simple so elegant !!

Chris Williamson's avatar

Spectacular.

Cuckfucius's avatar

thanks Chris!!

Jaskirat's avatar

effortlessnesscels seething at frustrationmaxxers

Erazmus's avatar

This is so apparent that it is evident in how meditation BTFOs many who try it IMMEDIATELY. Meditation... Literally "do nothingmaxxing", creates frustration.

Cuckfucius's avatar

super well said. the frustration can be invited from the outside, but the biggest frustrations / pains tend to be on the inside

mil3na's avatar

Reading Vagabond right now. I didn't believe it was as good as they say it is... but IT IS that good

Cuckfucius's avatar

it is literally THAT GOOD ! glad you're reading it, such a treat. wanna get the physical volumes some day

Lucas V.F's avatar

Ty for another gem Cuckfucius 🙏

Livy's avatar

Hank green is genuinely my beacon of grounded news and positivity. Hank green is my barber.

toru's avatar

You brought to mind another great essay I read about how _real_ practice is supposed to feel. That piece also recontextualized something I have been struggling to name for a while, something which I definitely glanced at as a child and then forgot.

https://pointingatthings.substack.com/p/torture-bliss

Also damn you are very good at cultivating a parasocial relationship with me. I can feel you are one of every living being that is rooting for my success. Keep it up.

Cuckfucius's avatar

that's a wonderful essay! Thank you for sharing. Torture-bliss is a great way of putting it. I'm still in a will-they-wont-they situationship with torture-bliss, but looking to put a ring on it post haste, she is too tantalizing

Barry Doan's avatar

VAGABOND!!! Automatic upvote. I loved how the manga portrayed the paradox of effort/effortlessness, focus/flow, and ambition/gratitude.

If anyone's interested, I wrote a piece earlier this year on Vagabond and Tendai Buddhism, contrasting the spiritual paths of Musashi and Sasaki.

MJ Chandran's avatar

This is hilarious because I wrote about wu wei very recently and it’s the complete opposite tone of my post. Loved it!

J.E. Petersen's avatar

I'm over here looking for a way to spiritually bypass the realization that I've been spiritual bypassing for like ever.

Cuckfucius's avatar

we all have, and all will continue to for a while! look at what you can, and then more will enter the field later~

James's avatar

I often find Hank Green annoying as hell, but I got to give it to him this time. Thanks Cuckfucius for illuminating the path once again.

Virgin Monk Boy's avatar

This is the part fake spirituality always skips: the sage didn’t become effortless by vibing near a bamboo plant and calling it alignment. Wu wei is what happens after the awkward reps, the frustration, the failed attempts, and the ego getting dragged across the dojo floor. Effortlessness is earned. Otherwise it’s just laziness wearing a little silk robe and quoting Lao Tzu badly.